Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Best Lesbian Blog in the Entire Universe?

Well imagine my surprise to find (daughter of Are You My Mothers a la has been nominated as one of the Best Lesbian blogs of 2007.

Thank you to whomever made the nomination (I swear it wasn't me). I am honored and thrilled and promise to try to keep representing as best I can and to learn to like the word lesbian, to not suggest that it sounds like something that happens to your skin in the winter.

I need a better moisturizer I have a bright red lesbian on my elbow.

Did you see that man? He's covered in lesbians.

It was so gross, during class she was peeling her lesbian.

Thank you all my dear sweet readers again and again. There must be a way to vote. I will keep everyone posted.

Here's what I did today: spent ten hours that I absolutely did not have gathering the creme de la creme of Betsy's old baby and toddler clothing, placing it in bags, making a list for each bag of every item in the bag, and taking all seven bags to a local children's clothing resale store where I was paid $45 for the lot. That works out to be $4.50 an hour for my time never mind that I should have given it all away. I blame it on Hannah Montana and the resultant loss of brains cells that listening to her CD has caused.

But back to lesbians. Are lesbian mothers more embarrassing than straight mothers? I'm guessing in winter they are (the puffy puff mama down coat/vest snapped up to the neck, the LL Bean duck boots, the Peruvian knit hat with earflaps, need I go on).

I tried not to embarrass Phoebe my girlfriend's daughter during racquetball yesterday. I play so terribly I thought if I sang a Bette Midler tune loudly it would make it look like I wasn't really trying and therefore not as bad a player as I really am. Well that didn't work. Turns out twelve and a half year olds don't appreciate Bette Midler covers during racquetball. Nor are they fond of 46 year olds rapping in public.

Straight mothers at least apply make-up. If someone is going to embarrass the pants off of you better they've put their face on. And I hear lipstick helps keep your lips from getting lesbians.


theoldladywhoswallowedafly said...

I love reading you here, uncensored. I really enjoyed your blog on, but I feel like you're more "real" now, if that makes any sense at all.

Ms. Moon said...

Uh- let me just say that not all straight mothers wear lipstick, just as all lesbian mothers probably don't wear Birkenstocks.
Wait. Am I really a straight mother? I wear very sensible shoes. My favorite pants are men's cargo shorts. I hate bras. When I do wear make-up I say I'm in drag. I have as many gay friends as I do straight.
What's up with THAT?

By the way, congratulations.
I enjoy reading you.

Hahn at Home said...

Hey! Terrific blog! Had no idea you were out here in the Internets!

Good luck on your TLL Lesbian Blog of the Year nomination!

Lesbian moms rock!

Anonymous said...

I love reading your blog. I enjoyed following it post by post at so glad you have continued here.
I say sing along... watch her face scrunch up in embarrassment. Its all part of enjoying life. :)

RaJen said...

But wait! I'm a lesbian mom-to-be and I wear lipstick (two colors, by the way, for the highlights), and I love my heels (though I'm wearing them less as my pregnancy wanes on). Then again, my partner is less makeup and coordinates her tennis shoes with her outfit. So maybe we'll only be moderately embarrassing to our twins. Maybe.

Are You My Mothers said...

Thanks you all! Oh of course lesbos can don a bit of face-paint. Eyeliner is my personal wake-up tool but that's just because I don't know how to work the mascara.

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