Friday, January 9, 2009

Earth Acne

My girlfriend and I have a theory about the earth, that it is much like the human body with hotbeds of eruption and then landscapes of inactivity, that the body's greasy, sweaty areas of glandular excitement like the base of the nose with its blackheads, whiteheads, and pustules, or the tushy/vagina/penis region with all of its discharge, can be likened to those places on earth that host war and mayhem generation upon generation. Maybe there is some barometric hormonal earth thing going on that just keeps everyone in those regions all whizzed up.

This theory came about as we lay in bed and discussed Palestine and Jerusalem, the middle East in general, northern Ireland. The earth's equivalent of the back of a nostril, the mouth, the forehead, places always festering and in turmoil. And then there's Scandanavia. What goes on there? Scandanavia is the back of your hand, a thigh, a smooth and effortless place with nary a zit or boil.

I'm a Jew who certainly does not want to ever experience a genocide or pogrom or even a Bernie Madoff, on the other hand killing can't ever be right. Just as in a family in which hitting is never the answer, how can bombing alongside a school be the answer.

Then again, I'm too much of a Freudian to believe there ever will peace on earth. The earth will bubble over with aggression so long as beings inhabit it. The best we can hope for is to slow it down. Who knows. I am no politico. It just doesn't seem right. This violence. Violence begets more violence, does not make the world a safer or better place.

Meanwhile we have such a kitty saga going on. It will take days to tell. Until I begin that story I highly recommend eggplant parmesan with goat cheese instead of mozarella.

And Newman's Limeade mixed with Seltzer.

And warm sake.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Peaking Out From Behind the Curtain

Oh yes. We're back. Me and my arrow. Blogging got drag so I left it for a bit. This morning, 1000 lightyears from the last post I woke up with something to say. I think this blogger needed to disconnect from: the gig that made me think all I could write about was parenting; the people who know and love me and read this blog regularly and then call me to ask if I'm in a bad mood; myself. My readership is now down to one - me. So here we go...

Despite the freedom of content a note of course about parenting: we have a friend who is mom to an 8 year old girl and when her daughter is angry this friend gets so freaking angry herself and then it's a screaming match and everyone is out of control, which got me thinking that my daughter's anger definitely does not anger me. I don't get angry when she's angry. But I do get really angry sometimes at weird other things like: when she steps on my toe, doesn't swallow her saliva and begins talking as if she has a cleft palette (I want to shout SWALLOW!), when she trashes her room, when she dawdles and we're running late. These things make me nuts. I don't lose it but I clench my teeth and then daughter says "Mommy you're tense" which makes me even nutsier. But flat out rage on her part, screaming at me, never upsets me. I think good for her and I hope she is okay.

And I have friend who hits her child. Enlightened lesbian Boston where everyone recycles and saves flood victims in New Orleans and donates to homeless shelters and supports Obama, JFC if you know what I mean. Hitting is never okay. Some people will disagree and frankly I don't care to hear from them, which I won't because now I am the only reader of this blog. How do you teach your child not to hit by hitting them? How do you teach them to control their aggressive impulses when you yourself don't? Model the behavior you want.

Maybe I will only write when I am angry. Maybe I should rename this blog Are You My Angry Mother?